I went on my first camping trip this weekend. There was dirt everywhere, and I loved it.
When you go camping, you drive an hour to a campsite. You unload your camping equipment, and then you get back in the car and drive home to get the stuff you forgot. Like tent poles.
Once you have returned to the campsite, you set up your tent and go for a hike. It doesn’t matter if there are only thirty minutes before dusk– HIKE!
Then you eat. You eat your food, you eat your owner’s food, you eat the dirt, the pine cones, and some of the pine needles. And you save some in your dog-beard for later.
There will probably be a campfire. Fire pits are even more fun than dirt. Avoid them when they get hot– but still try to singe anything else around you, like your leash.
When it is time to go to bed, you will have to get into the tent. This does not mean it is time to sleep. Rather, use your quiet hours in the tent trying to escape. Go for the screen doors; the holes you create will show up best there.
There are many strange sights and sounds when you are camping. Make sure to bark at every single one.
In the morning, wait to pack up camp until it starts raining. That way, your car, and eventually your apartment, will smell like campfire AND wet dog. For days.